There are Polymarket ads in fortune cookies.
There are pop-ups in our prayers.
There are paywalls on the monasteries,
and the monks are millionaires.
Well little Johnny’s gone to war.
He joined the McMarines.
The Iranians must be liberated
and blown to smithereens.
Light a candle in the chapel, John,
and pray to Western God,
and listen to the homily
the preacher wrote with Claude.
“Oh Western God, please guide our drones,”
the pious Johnny prayed.
“That we may safely bomb their schools
and turn their children gray.”
The candle disappeared from sight
a minute into Johnny’s prayer,
and was replaced with hologram ads
for DraftKings and Wayfair.
Johnny placed his hand upon his heart
with reverence and love
and worshipped the blood-soaked, hungry god
in the great big bank above.
__________________
My work is entirely reader-supported, so if you enjoyed this piece here are some options where you can toss some money into my tip jar if you feel inspired. All my work is free to bootleg and use in any way, shape or form; republish it, translate it, use it on merchandise; whatever you want. All works co-authored with my husband Tim Foley. No generative AI used in any works.
